After A Christmas

Whole One Month Preparations And Celebrations Are Over; Christ is Born.

Now Life Again Return Back to Normal,

I am Leaving Little Jesus Here, Taking My Burdens On My Shoulder,

Before Leaving I Looked and Smiled at Him and Told Him “See You On Good Friday and Then Easter”

He Smiled Back,

Yea, I Know Nothing Can Be Changed, Perhaps He Too Know That.

While I Walked Through The Rough Climate Outside, I Realized That I Am Happy But I Am Sad.

Perhaps I Should Not Be Here, I Shouldn’t See Him,

Then Perhaps I Could Have Less Pain When I Pierce His Heart, When I Thrash Him To Bleeding, When I Throw Him To The Most Painful Death.

My Legs are Trembling, I Was About to Fall, Suddenly I Took My Conscious Back, I Shouted To My Legs To Be Strong,

I Said Them “We Have to Go A Long Path Forward Before You Forget How To Walk”  

And I Raised My Legs High and Forced Them To Move Forward.

Yes, Tomorrow I Will See This Beautiful Little Child as a Handsome Active Youth,

But I Won’t Get Time to Cherish In His Success and His Graceful Happiness,

In No Time I Will See Him Dragged Through The Streets Like One The Most Hated,

And I Will Be There In One of Them To Drag and To Kick Him.

Oh I Closed My Eyes,

I Don’t Know Why This Thoughts Coming In To My Mind,

I Should Have Move Forward, I Said Myself,

I Walked Forward Resisting The Cold Wind,

Slowly I Tried To Forget Him,

But I Know I Can’t Forget Him,

Time is Moving Fast, And I Won’t Get Time to Forget Him,

When I Reach Jerusalem , I Will See You As A Scapegoat Before Me, For Me,

And Even Though I Wish to Help You, I Won’t,

Instead I Will Throw You Into the Hands Who Wants to Shatter You,

At That Time You Will Smile At Me and I Will Remember That Beautiful Smile of You When I First Saw You In The Cradle With Your Mama and Papa, I Will Remember Your Raised Little Hands At Me and The Kiss I Gave To Those Beautiful Hands of Yours; In This Cold Christmas Day.

I am Holding My Tears, For That Day,

I Want to Burst to Cry, But No, Not Now,

I Will Cry, I Will Burst To Cry In Silence,

But Only After Throwing You to Those Merciless Hands For My Greed, To Keep My Priorities.

I Walked Forward,

Murmuring…